Goofing On The Side
by Alice Shade
Summary: It's unusual pairing, but nothing you can't show kids. Honestly.


_I dont own Rescue Rangers. I use them for entertainment purposes only, and make no profit whatsoever from this work of fiction._

Goofing On The Side.

Tammy tentatively knocked on the door. She doubted anyone would hear it, through. She was late, and she came now only to be sure. Usually, on Sundays, Rangers had dayoffs, and didn't minded her joining in. And she usually came about nine at morning, and spent all day with them. However, today, she had to help out her mother on big clean-up, and thus - was VERY late. It was almost two by the time she finished up. By that time, Rangers HQ should be empty.

Tammy knocked again. No answer. She was about to turn around and go look for Rangers at the fountain, when she noticed fog crawling from under the door. She blinked. Come to think of it, she realised, that it's cool near the door, despite the sizzling heat. "Gadget must be testing out one of her inventions again..." - she thought. Her curiosity was peaked, and she pushed the door. It wasn't locked, and she slipped in. This new development was intriguing to her, because this meant, that she had some chances on privacy with Chip.

Inside was a lot of low noise - Tammy stopped and turned her head around for several minutes, trying to understand, where sounds do come from. Hammering, obviously, came from Gadget's workshop. Music - from main room. Sizzling - from kitchen. Tammy peeked in the kitchen. Monty was there, puttering around the stove. It was laden with pots and frypans. Tammy knew better then to bother him - when he was cooking one of his 'surprise' dishes, he was more secretive then ANS agents. Tammy said "Hi!", and closed the door. Anyway, Monty wasn't interesting much to her - she rather prefered him to stay on kitchen.

Tammy made a beeline to the bedroom - she figured Chip to be there. Being in Gadget's workshop was hazardous for health, when mouse invented something there and Monty wouldn't've allowed anyone to stay in kitchen. Of course, he might be in the main room, but she had to pass through it, so her plan covered it all.

When she encountered Dale in the main room, she realised, that Chip would rather be anywhere but here. Dale had the supreme reign over the room, he took over the stereo and was doing his best to goof up as much as possible, with broom as an electric guitar. There was some machine in the corner, which produced the fog, covering the floor in the room. Tammy stopped and giggled on Dale's antics - he never saw her come in, and haven't heard her either, so he continued his act. Tammy was about to slip down the room towards bedroom, but the opportunity was too good to pass up. She cleared her throat, not very loud, but still enough to be heard over speakers. (To his honor, Dale put music on moderate volume.) She expected Dale to be embarassed and throw broom away as a live grenade, and got apologetic smile ready. Dale, as she expected, jumped up about three inches, and somehow managed to turn in air, so he landed with his face towards Tammy. He, instead of dropping the broom like a red-hot poker, air-guitared it, then smashed it in the floor, and holding it like a mic, with a freaky face lip-synced with song - "Build a new god, to medicate and to ape, sell us ersatz, dressed up and real fake!" Tammy, without thinking, answered - "Anything to belong, anything to belong..." Dale made even more freaky face and continued - "Rock, is deader than dead! Shock, is all in your head!" Tammy couldn't held it longer, and fell on the floor, rolling from laughter. Dale chuckled, and put the broom in the corner, then came to Tammy, and helped her up.

Tammy recovered from her laughter enough soon enough. "Good heavens, Dale! One of those days, you're going to make me explode." - she said, smiling. Dale gave her a smile back - "I'm not that bad, am I?" "Bad, my foot! You're hilarious!" - exclaimed Tammy. Dale shrugged - "It's easy with one who knows, what I'm talking about." Tammy blinked - "What do you mean?" Dale squirmed - "Well, noone of Rangers would know to sing along." Tammy rubbed the side of her nose, a little embarassed - "Well, my mom doesn't like me listening to this 'freaky' music too. How come Rangers don't mind?" Dale shrugged in his turn - "They never listen anyway, so they just don't know." Tammy waved to him, and skipped down the corridor.

An hour later, she was sitting on the chair, and was thinking, what in the name of all holy things is she doing there. She's been through some pretty boring things, but that took the freaking cake! Ok, maybe she was a bit annoying, throwing herself at Chip. Ok, maybe he wasn't interested in her, either. But, in the name of gentlehood, could he at least talk to her? Sitting here for an hour, watching him reading another of his books - that was enough to drive any girl nuts. And even if she liked to admire him, she had enough of that in the last hour! Tammy stood up, and put the chair to the side, creating a little noise in the process. Chip just gave her quick glance, and returned to his book. Tammy snorted, turned and left the room. She shut the door behind her, without much caring about Chip. Even if she disturbed his peace YET AGAIN, he deserved it all!

Tammy stomped down the corridor, still fuming. The nerve of the 'munk, good grief! Was she that insignificant that she didn't deserved to be noticed? She pulled the door with a little bit more force, then needed, and it came loose way easier then she expected. The result was one swearing squirrel with bruised paw. Dale, who was in the room behind the door, raised his brow. "Ouch. Are you OK, Tammy?" - he asked. Tammy gave him a glare, but before she gathered scathing enough reply together, Dale frowned. "Of course, you're not." - he stated, and taking her by the elbow, led her to the fog machine. "Put your paw in the output." - he ordered. Tammy was about to tell him off, when he put her paw in the output himself. Tammy oohed, as cold fog immediately relieved the pain. "Thanks..." - she muttered, flexing her paw a little, and wincing at the small flicks of pain, quenched by the cold fog immediately.

Dale stepped around the machine, so he was facing Tammy, and looked her square in the eye. "Gosh, Tammy, what happened?" - he asked, concerned. Tammy wanted to tell him off again, and ask him not to stick his nose in her business, but couldn't quite muster the anger to do so. After a few seconds, her shoulders slumped in defeat. "Chip's ignoring me." - she murmured, staring on her paw.

Dale slowly shook his head. "So that's what..." - he drawled.

Tammy nodded - "Yeah. I don't know, what to do. I mean, I practically throw myself on him, and nothing. What can I do to make him pay any attention to me?"

Dale shrugged - "Hard to say."

Tammy looked on him straight - "Look Dale, you're his best friend. You ought to know. What does it takes to get his attention?"

Dale coughed apologetically - "Uh, Tammy..."

Tammy suddenly grabbed his lapels and shook him - "Come on, Dale!"

Dale grabbed Tammy's paws, and said - "I really don't know, Tammy. I don't remember any girl who could say she won Chip over. It was always he who decided that girl would be his girlfriend. There were girls who turned him down, of course."

Tammy shook her head - "You're kidding. Chip ought to have some feelings, too."

Dale winced - "Tammy..."

Tammy yelled - "I don't care that you're uncomfortable talking about that! I want to know the truth."

Dale continued to wince - "Tammy... You're standing on my foot."

Tammy jumped back, like she stepped on ember. "Oi, I'm sorry, Dale, please, I didn't do it on puprose, honest!" - Tammy was shooting apologies rapid-fire. Dale waved them off.

"S'ok. Look, Tammy... If you want to talk about that, why don't we step outside?" - he offered.

Tammy considered offer for a second, then nodded - "Of course, you're right."

Dale opened a door, and waited for Tammy to pass through - "After you, mademoiselle."

Tammy giggled - "Sounds much better then bint, I must say."

Dale blinked - "Chip calls you that?"

Tammy stared on Dale - "Heavens forefend! That's how my uncle once called me. He's a bit of hick."

Dale breathed audible sign of relief. Tammy frowned on this.

"Daale!?" - she singsonged, - "Is there something you're not telling me?"

Dale squirmed - "Nothing, honestly."

"Nuh-huh-huh! Out with it, mister!" - said Tammy.

Dale made pouty face, and whispered - "Ok, but only because you twisted my hand."

Tammy giggled, but maintained stern face, and asked - "So?"

"Well, Chip has a habit of giving nasty nicknames to people who are annoyi..." - Dale almost bit off his tongue, when

he realised, what he blurted.

Tammy frowned. That wasn't to her liking, but, sadly, fitted. Two months ago, she wouldn't believe it and burst in tears. Right now, she just was annoyed. Without a word, she grabbed Dale's hand, and dragged him out of the door. Dale did his best to follow. When they both were ten feet up the tree, Tammy took a seat on the small branch, just enough for two to comfortabily sit, and patted the space beside her, inviting Dale to sit next to her. Dale hesitated a bit, and Tammy said - "Sit down, Dale. I don't bite. Well, unless you won't sit." Dale cringed, but sat down.

Tammy sat quiet for a bit, propping up her chin on arms.

"Am I attractive?" - she asked suddenly.

Dale fidgeted - "Erghm.. Emrm... Yeah."

Tammy hadn't shifted her posture, she just asked - "Are you telling truth?"

Dale replied - "Of course!"

Tammy shrugged - "Then, why wouldn't Chip go out with me, if I am attractive?"

Dale again fidgeted a bit. "Well... Well... You see..." - he hemmed.

"Dale, I'm big girl. You can tell me." - she said lightly, blowing the hair out of her eye.

"Ugh! Chip's so fixed on Gadget, he just won't pay attention to other girls!" - exclaimed Dale.

Tammy turned slightly to the side, and regarded Dale with a look. "You mean, he's so caught up trying to woo Gadget, he passes up other girls?" - she asked.

"Well... Yeah." - lamely agreed Dale.

"And you mean, he doesn't realise Gadget has no wish to date him?" - asked Tammy evenly.

"Tammy... Uh... It's quite sordid." - Dale was running out of rope fast, Tammy already cornered him in some questions.

"Sordid? How?" - now Tammy was very curious.

"Well, Gadget already turned him down twice. He just won't give up." - Dale decided to run through this topic as fast as possible. He cursed yet again the day he passed up an offer to pierce tongue back in school. Maybe if he did, he could lock his tongue, so it won't get him in trouble?

Tammy signed - "Well, he's insistant, I'll give him that. Is he in love with Gadget?"

Dale was looking majorly nervous now - "I... I dunno, really!"

She grabbed his ear, and pulled Dale's face to her own, nose to nose. "I won't tell anybody about it. Honestly. I swear on my virgin honour, everything you'll say will remain between us, if you won't tell anybody."

Dale sweated bullets by the end of her speach.

"Tammy... Uh... Chip, well... He's weird that way. He wants to be like Sureluck Jones. That's all I can tell! Please!" - Dale pleaded.

Tammy signed and let go of Dale's ear.

"S'ok, you already told me what I need to know." - she said, and turned back. They say several minutes in silence, then Tammy, without looking on Dale, asked - "Hey, Dale, did you ever had girlfriend?"

Dale, relieved, that he was off the dangerous topic, replied - "Well, I did had several."

Tammy leaned back somewhat.

"Do you have one now?" - she asked.

"No, not really." - replied Dale.

"Why? You fell in love with Gadget too?" - asked she evenly.

Dale almost fell from the branch. Then he giggled. Tammy regarded him with another look.

"What's so funny?" - she asked.

"Well..." - Dale was still giggling.

"Well, what? You like to flirt with her, don't you?" - asked Tammy again, a bit lazy.

Dale resumed some semblancy of seriousness.

"Gadget's really pretty and smart, and she's a superfriend, but... I'd be scared out of my wits, if she decided to actually date me." - he replied.

"Why?" - asked Tammy, now curious.

"Because, for all I know, she might show up one day, and tell me she invented kissing machine." - said Dale flatly.

Tammy guffawed - "You silly... Girls like to kiss!"

Dale shook his head - "Gadget's so smart, she rarely bothers herself with so 'instinctive' things."

"What about the time she dressed up and kissed you?" - asked Tammy. She knew a lot of previous adventures of Rangers, courtesy of Monty and his story-teller skills.

"Yeah, that was fun." - Dale mused, - "But she never does that just for kicks. She just doesn't like it."

Tammy shrugged - "Hey, Dale... So Gadget and Chip are a bunch of weirdos... Let me ask you, as a normal guy. Would you go out with me?"

Dale squirmed on his seat - "Are you asking me out, or asking in general?"

Tammy shrugged again - "Does it matters?"

Dale pondered that for a few seconds. Then, he said, cautiously - "I think, that I wouldn't mind going out with you, of course, that is if you wanted to go out with me not just to get back at Chip."

Tammy rubbed her nose - "Do you think Chip would even notice?"

Dale was cornered on this one, and he knew it - "No, I guess, no."

Tammy blew the hair out of her eye again - "Sorry, I meant to ask something else. You say you've had several girlfriends, right?"

Dale nodded, and Tammy continued - "How did you knew, when it was the time to break up with them?"

Dale hummed for a few seconds. Tammy recognised the 'Mission Impossible' theme. He rubbed his cheek, then suddenly laughed short embarassed laugh - "Now when you mention it, I guess I don't, really."

He stretched his left arm behind his back, and muttered something moderately rude, when his shoulder emitted a crack. "I think.... Well... I don't have much experience in breaking-up, Tammy. My most usual break-up was because girl moved away. That was back at school. Then... Well, I dated one girl who started shouting at me and ordering me around as soon, as me and her became an item... I guess I just got tired if it, real fast. I mean, if I need to be called dummy, I can always ask Chip to do it, and I won't even have to kiss him for that." - Dale paused, and flexed his arm.

"I never quite gathered the nerve to break with her face-to-face..." - Dale suddenly chuckled, - "Instead, I enrolled in the summer military camp, wrote her a letter, and sent it from the bus station."

Tammy laughed some too, - "Smart move, Einstein. Instead of one girl, you've got dosen drill instructors ordering you around."

Dale shook his head - "I liked it way better. At least, drill instructors didn't had the habit of bursting into tears every time I told them off."

Tammy shook her head, bemused. "So you broke up with her via letter?" - she asked. Dale nodded.

"So you didn't dated after that?" Tammy queried.

"My a... antlers, no!" - Dale's furtive smirk showed Tammy, that he intended to say what he said. She smirked, and pushed him in the shoulder.

"So what about your other girlfriends?" - Tammy resumed questioning.

"Then, I dated Natasha... It was all fine, until she totally fell for Chip. We talked this over, and decided that we'll be better off on our own." - Dale's voice contained a little bit of bitterness. Tammy blinked in surprise - "You mean, Chip stole your girlfriend? And you're still friends with him?"

Dale shook his head - "No, Chip treated Natasha just as you now. But I couldn't date girl who was head over heels in love with my best friend, could I?"

Tammy shook her head too - "No, I guess not. So you quit dating after this?"

Dale gave her an exaperated frown - "Tammy, if you can't get something right from the first try.... or from the dosen tries, it's not the reason to quit trying."

Tammy nodded - "Right. So what was then?"

"Then... Then, I had some bad luck with dating. Quickly lost four girls in three months. Then I started dating Nika." - Dale turned silent.

Tammy prodded him again - "Was this Nika so bad you don't want to talk about her?"

Dale shrugged - "Nika.... She's another Gadget. Chemistry whiz. When she tried her IDF on me, I sort of started omitting her."

"What's IDF?" - asked Tammy.

"Instant Depilation Formula." - said Dale with a sign. Tammy scrunched her eyes.

"Oh god! So you broke up with her after?" - she supposed.

"Yeah, as soon as I dared to went out of house." - said Dale, - "I don't really think she cared much. Last time I heard about her, she was working at the MagnaChem as a senior scientist."

Tammy rubbed her paws, as if she was cold - "Well, her loss. So, didn't that discouraged you?"

Dale snorted - "Discourage, me? Well... Sorta. I decided I'd better omit letter N for some time."

Tammy giggled - "So your next girl was named?"

Dale signed - "Well, I really messed up next one. Met really interesting girl, named Julie, but... She had serious issues with Chip. As soon as I mentioned him, she just up and left. Never could talk to her after, too. She sorta disappeared."

"Aww, poor guy... So, what next?" -cooed Tammy.

"Next, I met Gadget, and for a while flirted with her. But she's worse then Nika. Nika, at least, liked to kiss." - Dale shrugged yet again.

Tammy asked - "So, you've been hooked on her ever since?"

"Hellooo...!" - Dale pretended to knock on Tamy's forehead, - "Anyone home?"

"Stop it!" - snickered Tammy, - "Ok, ok, so you had dated after it?"

Of course, Tammy knew, that Dale was involved with some girl bat.

"Well, yeah... Just recently broke up, in fact." - he replied.

"Huh? What happened now?" - asked Tammy, now quite serious.

"Well... It's stupid, really. You might remember Foxglove, right?" - asked Dale back.

"Pink bat? I saw her several times, but she was always asleep when I was around." - mused Tammy.

"Yeah, s'her. She was with me sort of like you with Chip, and I was pretty embarassed at first. Then, we got along quite well, and... Well, we took her in for time being. But then, we found her parents. We thought she was orphan, but turned out, that she's from european family. Aristocratic one, to boot. Blue bloods, and all that. So we rushed her there, and for a while it was very cool. But her parents asked us to leave, 'to give them time to bond back as a family, without interruptions.'" - Dale shrugged, - "I got a letter from her two weeks ago. She's all fine, she's forever grateful, we're welcome to be her guests anytime, and she writes specially to me, that she's sorry, that I'm a great guy, but we couldn't make it work, that her parents arranged a marriage for her already, and that she hopes that we can remain friends. The usual stuff."

Tammy fluffed the tuff of fur on his head. "I'm sorry." - she muttered. "S'ok. Not that I was in love with her, or anything." - replied Dale.

Tammy continued to play with Dale's ears with her left paw. Dale didn't seem to mind.

"Hey, Dale... What do you like in girl most?" - she asked.

"I dunno. Easiness, I think." - he mused. "Not in the sence of being easy! I mean to look on life easily, don't make a tragedy out of it, or try to learn everything in the world." - he hastily corrected himself.

Tammy rubbed his right ear between her fingers - "Hmm... What about that sence of being easy?"

Dale blushed - "Well, now then you mention it... I'd prefer to date a girl who doesn't consider second base a very special stuff."

Tammy tightened her grip on his ear a little - "So you'd prefer an easy girl, after all?"

Dale stiffened somewhat - "Only so far. I abhorr whores."

Tammy relaxed her paw. For a while, she was just sitting there, petting Dale's ears. Then, she spoke up - "Dale... Remember what happened last week?"

Dale scratched his nose - "Besides 'Best Zombie Attack Movies' all-nighter?"

Tammy patiently hinted him - "It has something to do with you and me. You was pretty surprised."

Dale opened his mouth, and shut it, and opened it again - "You mean that moment, when you kissed me instead of Chip by mistake?"

Tammy nodded - "Well, it wasn't a mistake."

Dale unhinged his jaw, then worked it up to closed position again - "You mean, you wanted to kiss me? Why?"

Tammy blushed - "Well, it's stupid... It's just that we, girls, have this... test, of sorts."

"What kind of test?" - queried Dale.

"Oh, if you're unsure, if you like the guy, you have to kiss his best friend. If you like it more, then kissing guy, then you have to break up with him." - explained Tammy.

"So you didn't liked it better?" - asked Dale, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Tammy giggled - "Quite the contrary."

"WHAT?!" - Dale wasn't sure that he heard correctly.

"Well, I might've not got the right feeling, it was so fast... Let's retry that, should we?" - before Dale could say anything, Tammy pressed her lips to his.

A second of 'Mmmphhh!', and Tammy suddenly realised, that she's been kissed back, and that felt quite pleasant, much unlike her previous experiments. Frankily, she wished to stretch this pleasure for as long as she would have the breath, but sudden feelings made her open her mouth a bit more then she intended. But by that time she sure didn't minded a bit.

Finally, they had parted. Tammy was panting by then. "Oh jeez..." - she whispered, flabbeggasted. Dale caught her silent exclamation, and craned his neck to look her in the eye.

"You OK, Tammy?" - he quipped.

"Uh...huh... Yeah. Oh my god, that was awesome." - Tammy panted out. She inhaled a lungful of air, and asked - "Are you sure you don't teach Kissing 101 in the local Y?"

Dale grinned - "Nah, I'm just an amateur."

"Well, you sure know your stuff!" - Tammy smiled back, - "Care to give me another sample?"

"Why not?" - Dale was always easy to negotiate with.

After a few minutes of kissing, Tammy asked - "Dale, what does it takes to ask you out?"

"A tongue." - he replied. Tammy stuck her tongue out on him.

"Well, how about meeting me tomorrow, in Maconda?" - Tammy was never the one you'd call shy.

"You go there too!?" - Dale was pleasantly surprised. This was one of his favourite cafes. It catered to college students.

"Of course! After all, I am going to a college next year, unlike somebody!" - answered Tammy.

Dale chuckled - "To tell the truth, I am on the second course already."

Now it was Tammy's turn to be utterly surprised. "You and college..?" - she asked.

"I'm on the correspondent courses. Being a rescue Ranger is fun and cool and stuff, but I better have something else in store." - Dale's explanation smashed Tammy into the unexplainable astonishment.

"I thought you're all fun and no work..." - she uttered.

Dale laughed - "Yeah, I am. That's why I take correspondence cources."

Tammy shook her head, - "You know, I think I'll never trust my first opinion again."

Dale nodded - "You'd better."

Tammy clapped her paws suddenly - "Back to our talk. How about a date tomorrow in the Maconda? At four."

"I'll be there." - replied Dale.

Tammy nodded, her eyes sparkling.

Dale suddenly laughed - "You realise that we'll need several dates to be officially an item?"

Tammy laughed too - "How they say?"

Dale explained - "One is an accident , two - coincidence, three - not system."

Tammy squealed - "Four it is!"

Dale quipped - "Does today counts?"

Tammy jumped up from the branch - "Let's make it count!"

And they scampered down the tree.


End file.
